April 10, 2009

Friends and pics

Man...I sure do feel rejected right now.

Well, I've written about this before, but I'll go over it again. The last few years I have had a hard time finding other women to be friends with. I've been to three different MOPS groups (mothers of preschoolers) and just don't fit. So I figured I was to be a loner for awhile, until the girls started school and made friends or something.

So I moved back to this house and I'm in town now. Lately I've been seeing this one lady I know all the time! We just keep running into each other; our children are the same ages, we are both pregnant and due in the summer, we're into health stuff etc. So I finally called her today and we talked about c-sections and stuff like that, and then as I tried to branch out into other topics, she said she had to go and to keep in touch.

Keep in touch...generally that doesn't condone a message of " I want to get to know you better". Also, I had a best friend. If you've been reading since the beginning you will remember this story. She wasn't a Christian and went down the wrong path. I kept praying and running into her. She hit ROCK BOTTOM and finally gave her life to God. She contacted me and I began discipling her and renewing our friendship. This girl is like my other half- we have a very special connection, even more so now that we are both saved. Well, after being very close and seeing each other a lot for a year, she drops me. We talk occasionally, but the last time we did, she dropped that same line.

"Keep in touch." That was two months ago. I decided not to call anymore. It hurts too much.

What's the deal? God used me in both of these ladies lives- the mom was praying about vbac options and I was able to offer a lot of info. Why can't I have a friend too? I am always being 'used', which is what I want, truly. But, I would like someone I could meet for lunch, or go shopping with, or just have a playdate with. Someone who understands where I am in life and can be a help and I can help her. It's very discouraging. I've been praying about it, but I wonder sometimes if the reason I haven't befriended anyone else is because we're supposed to move. I don't know.

On a lighter note, I decided to take some random pictures of my home today. I make a drink called kombucha- it's basically a fermented tea beverage. You use this thing called a scoby, a culture, that sits in the tea and converts it to a healthy tonic. Each time you make it, a new one forms on the top. Mine are out of control. They are taking over and I don't know what to do with them. This jar is a GALLON size jar...

Kinda gross huh?

Here's my favorite coffee cup.

My vintage, handmade toaster cover.

Our current fridge art. Leiah did this and I think it looks pretty good myself.

The kitchen table, with the various clutter lying beneath it.

What I was doing when I decided to take these pictures.

What I will do after I take the pictures.

My living room with the Easter decor.

The shelves loaded with all my trinkets, and the children's books.

The sewing 'hall' with all the current Easter dresses being finished up.

One of the Easter baskets I fixed the other day- they are hiding in my closet right now...


Leah said...

Keep praying my friend. God delivered a friend to me, but it took three years. I wouldnt have it any other way. Keep up the faith!

On the other hand, I think your pics are cute!


My Life With Boys said...

I've always had a hard time making friends too. I have alot of friends just not 'close' friends. Fortunately, I have my sisters though. They're the best friends you can have really. I know exactly what you're talking about though. Too bad we didn't live closer- I'd do fun stuff with you. You know- shop, dinner out and playdates. I love getting away with friends- it just doesn't happen enough. =( Oh well...maybe at a different time in my life. Having little kids makes it hard. Hope you have a great evening and praying you'll find that close friend you're seeking/praying for.

vehementflame said...

don't be sad and blue cause jesus loves you and he is your best friend!!!!! my husband is my one and only best friend- The only woman friend in 'real life' that I have could actually be my mom- she's mre like a relative than a friend....I know how you feel- I get all insecure too sometimes...umm yeah, glad I passed on the gross looking scoby- ha ha- just kidding! I love me some ice tea- I wanted some today but realized in all my fancy smacy tea ordering I forgot the one essential - black tea for southern style sweetness! thse dresses are sweet- you got some talent! Can I pay you to make me a fancy dress?

wifeandmom said...

First of all I think your house is lovely and your vintage toaster cover is just too cute! Secondly, I sure know what you mean about finding like minded women you can bond with. I tried MOPS too and just hit a brick wall! I am not the only one either. I have heard that from several ladies. It is so hard to find a kindred spirit isn't it. Well, I think you have some pretty loyal ladies here that care about you and think you are great. :) I know it isn't the same as flesh and blood, face to face friendship though. I beleive that God does have that for us and wants that for us and I think it is really ok to pray for that. You know, like praying for a spouse is good - so is praying for a friend to uplift, encourage and walk with you in this life.

Chin up and all that sort of thing. Don't let that lady discourage you. God has good things for you my dear. He really does!

liz from new york said...

i know just how you feel...it's hard enough to make friends, even harder to keep them. i try to be a good friend,but somehow other people are never as considerate to me as i would be to them. anyway, i also think alot of people, especially more so in N.Y. where people w/ larger families are an anomoly, are intimidated by me..i cant just always up and go somewhere, i take my family responsibilities seriously, as you do, and alot of people are not on the same groove.im a square peg in a round hole too!!

Anonymous said...

I always say that you know you have a "close" friend when you can have each other over without doing a cleaning frenzy before she comes over!
I know what you mean ~ I finally got a close friend and then I moved away :o(
I find most women just want to talk about fluffy stuff and then get uncomfortable if the conversation ever moves on to opinions or interesting, deep/meaty things. I even get a glazed look if something comes up about the Bible ~ even from Christian acquaintances. Oh, and if the talk of vitamins or health or how-to-make-things ever comes up... dazed blinking. I am going to make my own soap in about a week or so (gotta buy one more thing and then I'm done!) and I asked several women at our homeschool co op of they wanted to try it with me... glazed looks yet again. So, I'll do it alone!!

I'll bet you intimidate women because you have an opinion, you're pretty, you're intelligent, you seem confident, you're talented and willing to try new and interesting things. It's a friendship killer, I'll tell 'ya!

Keep praying for a special friend. It'll happen. Just don't change who God made you!

Anonymous said...

Hi, I loved your blog...I am a fan of Candy's at Keeping the Home and of course, being nosy, wanted to check out other people's home and blog. I loved it and if you lived in TN or if I lived in TX I would love to have a coffee/play date with you and your girls! I have 4 boys and 1 year and am expecting in October! I will pray about your move...we moved out of Florida 1 1/2 years ago because the Lord was leading us out of there and have found TN refreshing.
Many many blessings! Loly

His Tender Mercies said...

I don't think you are alone in the friendship dilema. I have friends but not close friends...that I get together with. I know for me it's the business of life that keeps me from really connecting with other ladies.