January 7, 2009

Out of Commission

I'm back. I have certainly been out of commission the last several days. That weird cough persisted and I didn't get adequate sleep for five days plus the usual pregnancy stuff plus we're moving...

There were a whole lot more things than that, but I do not wish to go through the details. I thought I would make a comparison of the things I used to do with what I do now, just for a laugh. Things change so rapidly when one is expecting!

Used To Do:

I had a daily cleaning plan

I cooked all meals from scratch

I planned the budget wisely

I made lots of frugal alternatives for detergent and cleaners and stuff like that

I sewed

I entertained guests

My house was spic and span

My laundry was mostly caught up

Children had more limited TV time

I vacuumed and mopped

I worked on my daily Nourishing Traditions food work (kefir, soaking etc.)

I took good care of dh

Now I do:

The laundry hampers are overflowing so I pick out what we need the most and wash that

The dishes get done once a day or so

The carpet hasn't been vacuumed in awhile...at least a week

I haven't swept the floor in many days

I have loads of processed food in my cupboards and am thankful it's there

I haven't baked our bread in several weeks, however I did make homemade cinnamon rolls Monday.

Dh has to make his breakfast and lunch and fend for himself somewhat.

Dh has a daily errand to run after work, several times a week

(I am meeting his most basic needs, don't worry)

I spend several hours a day resting

healthy food makes me hurl, or want to, except I have been craving salads

I feel I need a makeover- I feel ugly and dumpy

Children have unlimited TV time, however they didn't even turn it on today! I am amazed.

All that to say, my paradigm has shifted a lot the last few weeks. Before I chafed when my bare feet would touch the grit on the floor- now it's not that bad. I would feel idle and like a failure if I didn't get my check list finished. I would be terribly embarrassed if someone came into my home and the throw blankets and pillows were out of order.

I have found that I have relaxed a lot and have enjoyed just watching my children. I have a deeper bond with them now that I've slowed down to watch them play and play with them. They don't care about check lists and will never know if Mom got it done. Today after I hauled some stuff to the 'old house' we're moving back into, I was feeling rather weak and hungry, so we high tailed it McDonald's since it was close. After the girls ate they went to the play ground and I sat and watched them, so thrilled with the simplicity of sliding and crawling around in some plastic tubes and eating deep fried potatoes and chicken. They were delighted and I felt truly blessed to have little ones. They remind you of being a kid yourself and not to be so serious all the time.

Hopefully after we move I will morph back into my old self a little so that we can have nutritious food and a clean home and some organization. I had been planning to post the pregnancy diet I was going to follow, but since I'm not really following it I decided to hold off.

*************New Topic***********************************

Ok ladies, I am trying to figure out what to do. Many of you know that I have had three c-sections and have never been in labor. I tried for a vbac the last time, but my doctor put me in a hard place and sort of forced me into the surgery at the end. (yeah thanks a lot) I have been researching it for awhile, but my only options are c-section or unassisted birth. Midwives generally need to be backed my doctors, and doctors don't like vbacs, at least not as many as I've had.

I am praying, but I haven't got the right message yet. I am supposed to go next week for my first appointment with my OB from before- I mainly want to make sure there's just one baby :) But my husband and I aren't sure what to do since we will be moving again and relocating. I have been reading lots and watching lots of videos, but still am not sure of the right plan. I have spoken with one midwife and she turned me down.

C-sections aren't all bad, but I remember every detail, and surgery and hospitals just aren't pleasant. It's not home. I know labor and birth are hard work and somewhat painful and it's all new to me. I've never had a contraction! But, surgery isn't an easy recovery and i've never been able to breastfeed because of the pain. (for some reason I bleed for awhile until my skin toughens up, which it never does because I can't be hurting in three places at once. The nurses kept telling me the babies were latched on perfectly, but dang it hurt!)

I really want to work hard on this one, c-section or not, because it's free and the best for the baby and mom. (maybe I could lose some weight!) I am having a terrible time here- how am I supposed to wait another 7 months to hold this baby!? I can hardly wait to see and touch it. I have been 'baby hungry' for a good while, can you tell?

Ok, I have more research to do.


Anonymous said...

Sounds like you are doing exactly what you need to be doing right now....

I am normally such a healthy eater but when I was pregnant with our little boy all I wanted was JUNK JUNK JUNK!!! At one point my husband joked that my arteries were going to be clogged by the time our baby got here!!!

There's a theory out there that a pregnant woman's body craves simple fats and sugars because they are the most efficient way to grow a baby.

Try not to let the mess and "new routine" get to you so much. Around mid-pregnancy you'll be back to feeling a little more energetic.

Hugs and love.

Vix said...

YOu know bfing does hurt. I think when you have a tiny little mouth on...excuse the TMI.. large nipples.. its gonna hurt till you get toughened up a bit. Its just the tiny mouth that gets u. This time it only took a week but other babies it took 2 or 3 to get baby to latch right. :) Hugs.

Sarah said...

Why didn't your doctor want you to have a vbac last time? Personally, and this is just me, I would not want to have an unassisted vaginal birth after having three c-sections. Having never been in labor, you wouldn't really know what to expect. It would make me more comfortable to have medical professionals around. However, you need to do what is right for you. I will be praying for you on this matter. As for the breast feeding, you are right. It is free, and it is what is best for baby. If it is uncomfortable this time around, perhaps you can breast feed for the first few months. If it is downright painful, don't feel as though you have to do it! Sending (((HUGS))) and prayers your way!

Dora said...

I just wanted to tell you about my own experiences. I had an emergency ceasarian at 18 years of age due to a breech baby. I tried to for a vbac with baby no. 2 at 31 years of age (big gap, I know) but after labouring for 24 hours and only dilating 3cm, the baby's heart rate went up and another c-section was recommended.

So that's 2 emergencies and with baby no.3 I thought I had no choice but to book in for another section. It was a good thing I did because I wound up being told on the operating table I was extremely close to a uterine rupture.

I am now pregnant with no.4 and as much as I would have loved the opportunity to deliver naturally, I don't think it's worth the risk to either myself or the baby.

Whatever you decide, be sure you are aware of the risks.

Dora said...

I also wanted to tell you about my breastfeeding experiences. I breastfed my last 2 till they were 18 months old. Like you, it hurt so much when I first started but I realised it was due to nipple sensitivity.

If you perservere through the pain you will find it gets easier and easier. I was virtually crying each feed for the first week but it gradually eased untill there was no more pain or discomfort.

I hope that encourages you somewhat.

May God bless you and help you make the choices best for you and your family.

liz from new york said...

im an r.n., and know of a case with your same circumstance, mother wanted vbac, and used a midwife...unfortunately, the baby was "stuck", and mother was rushed to the hospital, and an emergency c was given, the baby was born with all kinds of problems due to lack of oxygen, very sad, because it had been an ideal pregnancy, that tragedy did not need to happen, please for the babys sake, don't take any chances....

Mrs. Darling said...

I know all about that awful nursing problem. My nipples bled with all three of mine. The last one I was determined to nurse regardless of the pain. The longest I had nursed the girls was 7 months and it was 7 months of pain. So when Peter came I wanted to get past that hurtle.

Well I did. I nursed him until he was 2 1/2! But I endured a lot of pain, yeast infection in the milk ducts, blood, toe curling pain that snet me to the lactation specialist over and over. Peter was losing weight and I still pressed on. With the help of Le Leche and specialists at the clinic I passed the pain hurdle and went on to nurse pain free.

I dont think i would try that hard again though. It was too much pain., too much time and too much stress.