Oops, as I was approving comments I got a mean one and went to delete it and accidentally deleted them all. Sorry.
The 'mean' comment was about the dress patterns I posted- they said I was drawn to them because I have no taste. Like I care.
Last night there was show on Discovery Health about Freebirthing- unassisted birth. I had also ready umpteen vbac stories yesterday, not to mention all the births I've seen online. Guess what? The whole natural birth thing is looking very unattractive to me now. I just really don't know if I can do it or if I can, if my husband could handle the intensity of it all. What husband wants to see their wife in pain?
My ideal scenario: go into labor at home, stay there until I'm certain I'm getting further along, go to hospital, find out I'm 6-7 centimeters, get the epidural, have the baby in a few pushes :) This happened to my sister twice- well, she just rested until she was fully dialated because she had the pain meds, then pushed the babies out in like 3-4 pushes. And one was over 9lbs!
However, after my husband watched that show, he is very apprehensive about natural birth. As a consequence, fear has been trying to get hold on me. In fact this morning I was fighting off a panic attack. So, I'm done with all of that. No more reading/watching. It's certainly not helping me out.
For anyone who has not had a c-section, you may not understand as much why I hate it. I was planning to write it out step by step, but I better not since I already had some anxiety issues this morning. Maybe another time. The first one was easier in that I didn't really know what to expect and it happened fast, but it was my most painful and hardest recovery. The other ones were more nerve wracking because I knew what to expect, but the recoveries were better.
Gotta go...maybe I can embellish later.